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19 November 2018

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11/19/18 #SameHere Hero: Katie

Today’s #SameHere🤙Hero: @katielovesloupus. I’m gonna let ya’ll get right into the story. But we’d shared Advocacy Alliance Member: Nicole’s @_intheloop_ about this disease as well. What’s interesting about Katie’s journey is how she wanted to act “ok” & hide it, like nothing was bothering her, physically. This hiding led to more problems, emotionally & physically, & now instead she is putting it all out there for herself & others! Welcome, Katie!

 

“I was diagnoised in 2017 with Lupus SLE, Discoid Lupus, & that was a shock to my family & myself. My life forever changed that day. I would forever battle a disease I won’t win. I was going to be taking drugs daily, sometimes 14 pills a day, that would wreak havoc on my body. On the outside, I put on a smile & tried to keep positive. Because I didn’t look sick physically, people around me thought lupus was a fakers disease. That felt shameful, which made me feel even more like I had to hide who I was & what I struggled with.

 

July 1, 2018, I dropped to the ground with a preforated ulcer, one that has a 50% mortality rate, which was caused by autoimmune suppresesnt drugs, the steriods, & stress. I was making myself sicker by trying to be okay.

 

I was rushed into surgery & had 15 mins to live due to the severity. My stomach acid was eating my internal organs from the hole that’d been created from ‘being ok’ all the time. When I woke up I had a 12 inch scar from where they had to pull my entire internal organs out to clean out my body. I’m 30, I was not okay, I was not fine. I decided that day I would not let anything stand in the way of allowing myself to be okay. I would yell it to the rooftop if I had to. This was not going to kill me.

 

I remember laying in that hospital bed hating my life & everyone around me because I didn’t understand what I had done to deserve this. Lost my job, my health, time with my daughter, more health complications. Why me? Then on the third day I realized it should in fact be me – & for the best reason. I was gonna tell my story & share the good bad & the ugly. I was not going to be shamed into pretending to ‘be okay.’ No. I needed to take care of me, because my body was so stressed from me internalizing the stress, that I almost died at 30. This has been my life & I am not ashamed to ask for help.

 

In the hospital, I got a pshychiatrist & a therapist I saw 2x a week to start talking about what I really was feeling like. I learned to be empowered in who I was & what was going on. It was my story & it was no one else’s to dictate but me. I still see them every week to check in on my health. Life is not easy & sometimes we get handed awful situations. But I was determined to come out the winner. The fighter. If I fought for myself, & talked about it, maybe someone else could feel not so alone. So I started a video blog.

 

I take medication, I go to therapy, & I openly & happily share about my disease & my ups & downs, the bad days & the blessings. How I made lemonade out of my lemons. It wasn’t a pity party, I felt grateful to be alive & I was going to take care of my entire wellbeing so I can help others do the same. I told my family, friends, when it was a bad day, good day. Maybe some thought I was oversharing, but why? It was my story to tell. It’s our lives & our childrens lives to stay healthy for. Shit happens, but let me help you clean it up. You dont have to do it alone.

 

People started following my blog & facebook posts, I had others reaching out with their incredible heart wrenching stories. It made me talk more & more abouit it, my scars tell a story of someone who was in a dark place & fought out of it. It’s okay to still have crappy days too. I would cry on my video blogs, because I wanted to show this was real & humanize not just the disease but me as a human. In hopes that someone would be kind to another person after watching me ugly cry about my struggles & wins that day; remembering we all have crap. We all have #SameHere🤙 stories, so let’s just lean on each other.”

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